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May 2008
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Got Wood?

A kind gentleman called in on 911 today because he got wood that wasn’t his. We (I) could have had so much fun with that, but that thought crossed my mind only after he hung up. Such questions that came to mind were:

  • œSir, how long is the wood, is it in lengths of 8 or 10? 
  • œIs it dark wood or light wood? 
  • œHave you see this wood before? 
  • œHave you put your hands on this wood? 
  • œHas anyone else touched the wood? 
  • œIs the wood laying down, or has it been placed vertically? 

I mean, I could go so many ways with that, now that I’ve thought of it!   Unfortunately, I didn’t. And of course, the wood in question was lumber…perverts!

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